So you’ve maxed out gold from your safe little keep,
Slayin’ kobolds while you’re half-asleep.
Now you're bored of your velvet throne-
Gonna see the world with a bag of bone.
You bought a map from a one-eyed sage,
Thought you’d level up on a jungle rampage.
But the streets don't care ‘bout your noble class-
The lepers bite and the priests wear masks!
It’s a holiday in Viridistan!
Where the pox eats nobles hand-in-hand!
It’s a holiday in Viridistan!
Hope your gods got a better plan!
You thought you’d dine with spice-laced wine,
But the fish god cult wants your spine.
Dancers smile with poisoned grace,
While a green-robed prince wants your face.
No saving throws, no courtly aid,
Just a pit trap in a silk parade.
You can’t fast-talk with your bardic lore-
You’re chained to a ziggurat’s bloodstained floor!
It’s a holiday in Viridistan!
Where you bathe in slime by goblin hand!
It’s a holiday in Viridistan!
You fight lepers just to make a stand!
Don’t you wish you’d stayed back home,
With your ale and your garden gnome?
But you had to flex that magic ring,
Now you're bleeding out in a fighting pit ring!
Burned by incense, robbed by priests!
Bitten by beggars in cursed streets!
Your cleric’s dead, your mage is dust-
And that green-eyed girl? Just a succubus!
It’s a holiday in Viridistan!
You’ve been cursed by a serpent clan!
It’s a holiday in Viridistan!
Roll for death or crawl back, man!
No comments:
Post a Comment